Thursday, October 27, 2011


I made the acquaintance of Katy O'Dowd just recently, and was impressed with her wit and style. A visit to her webpage, A IS FOR..., confirmed my suspicions that she was an up-and-comer and also cemented for me the fact that she is one to watch. She has TWO books coming out next year, and I for one will be all over them. She (along with Danny Bowman) helped come up with the title of one of my stories, and so was forever memorialized in it as a very strange child...

May I introduce to you-- Ms. Katy O'Dowd, with an introductory piece that has me frantic to see where it goes.

Let us imagine a man, a well-dressed, polite man, at the theatre with his sweetheart. He pulls her chair out for her, provides her with candied violets during the interlude, and hands her his handkerchief, washed and pressed, naturally, when she becomes upset at the sad part of the play. He takes her hand, to comfort her, and then lets it go – this is only their tenth date, and mores of the time dictate that it is too early for hand-holding.

After a late supper, the man gets his driver to take them to the young lady’s home, where she resides with her parents. On arrival at said destination he opens the door of the carriage, takes her gloved hand in his and helps her to alight. Standing behind her, he settles her cape more snugly around her shoulders, whispers a sweet nothing into her ear, and then takes his length of piano wire, and garrottes her, watching as her velvet slippered feet leave the ground, kicking at first with great force, as mewling sounds issue from her throat. Then feebly, and the kittenish cries cease.

Her body comes to rest and he lets it fall, gently, softly to the leaf-strewn ground, steps around her, climbs into the carriage, closes the door and raps on the roof to let the thug/driver know that he has said his goodbyes. As they turn the corner and out of sight, cries rent the otherwise silent night asunder – her parents have found her broken body.
He then goes home and takes tea with his mother and sister, settling aforementioned snowy white napkin ‘pon his spotlessly trousered lap.

If we were to mark our polished psycho out of ten, what would we give him? Being strict, he would certainly have to lose points for taking his sweetheart’s hand at the theatre.
What about the bit where he leaves his sweetheart’s head nearly sliced clean from her creamy shoulders, wound gaping and glistening with gore?

Oh, you silly! This is Etiquette for Eviscerators, Manners for Murderers if you will, not a chapter from Sense and Sensibility or some other worthy tome.
You can meet our Dapper Dispatcher, currently starring in a novella which is swiftly being turned into a series, in 2012.

For more about Katy O’Dowd, please read Heath Lowrance’s rather marvellous ‘That Damned Coyote Hill’. Her evil twin has two other books out in 2012, ‘The Scarlet Ribbon’ a medical historical sort of bodice ripper (as Derry O’Dowd) and ‘The Lady Astronomer’ a steampunky YA tale of adventure and derring-do.

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